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OH! Back from Kansas. My Mamaw passed away one week ago today and we had the funeral in Kansas. While it was good to see my Kansas family, the drive is a killer: 14hours. Blech. We did the drive up, funeral ( 2 hours from homebase) and drive back in 4 days. Yuck! I am SOOO glad to be home!
I tried to set myself up for success in the road food department-- but when you get into family cooking you special things, you just eat it and love that they love you.
Today I am back on the regiment of eating 1400 calories. I haven't weighed myself---eek!--- but I will roll with whatever it says and be ok with it. This is a snapshot in my life and I will get better. I feel like something has changed in me. I am not sure what, but the idea of fuel vs. food being my friend-- seems to be a big deal. I know I enjoy food, but I don't crave it like I did. I tend to emotional eat and it can be so compulsive. Now that I am back in my element, I feel like I have control again.
Dealing with my Mamaws funeral was hard- but to be truthful, I feel I have already grieved for her. An myself, if I am being honest. Certain people in my family can suck it, and I know I may not see them again. I am truly ok with that. Sometimes you have to take out the trash.
I can not even wrap my head around the fact she is gone forever. She was my first best friend and she always accepted me as I was.
Anyway, I will weigh in the morning and see what kind of damage was done over the past week; deal with it; an move on. I feel different. I am ready to change.
Happy Tuesday all!
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