I've discovered why it's taken me so long to eat better and exercise more. The entire thing is psychological, and based on my social anxiety, and not to do with willpower like I thought! Last night I went to the gym and started out all by myself and did the 25 minute first sesson of the C25k program on the treadmill. It was really fun! Towards the end of the workout, someone else came in and I instantly felt stupid and like I should stop, but with 4 minutes left I finished and moved on to a different area, the weights. I was doing really well on the weights and then a guy came in and I didn't want/felt like I couldn't do them anymore. Then I finished up on the bike and left.
Today, I started out the day satiated and happy and feeling good about everything, and then at lunch, the building I work in was having some sort of celebration and they were offering free ice cream cones. I was completely disinterested (really!) until my coworkers all gathered outside my office door waiting for me to come down with them. I made an excuse and they deflected it, and then I felt stupid and awkward and went down and got ice cream. And then I ate it so no one would ask me why I didn't eat it, because I wanted to feel normal and fit in.
In fact, everything I have down to potentially sabotage my efforts have been entirely because of a social situation that I wanted to keep the least awkward possible. So though this is a bit of a breakthrough in knowing how to change to keep this weight down and off, it's only by changing something about me I'd LOVE to change but don't know how to. So the options are to either avoid social situations altogether, which may lead to depression, which leads to binge eating, or I need to stop being afraid of being weird or different from anyone else. Sigh, this'll be a toughie. I'll ponder it while I munch celery tonight for dinner to keep below my RDI. :(
I'm most pissed because I would've much rather spent those 500 calories on something healthy and substantial and filling.
다이어트 캘린더 보기, 2010년 07월 14일:
|
1384 kcal
|
지방: 57.71g | 단백질: 58.61g | 탄수화물: 167.14g.
아침 식사: Watermelon, Blueberries . 점심 식사: Instant Noodles In a Cup. 저녁 식사: Boneless Skinless Chicken Breast, bacon style turkey, egg. 간식/기타: Cream (Half & Half), Lemon, Sugar Cubes, Waffle Cone, Chocolate Ice Cream. 더보기
|
|
2735 kcal
|
운동:
운동 기계 (느리게) - 5 분, 운동 기계 (중간속도) - 20 분, 컨디셔닝 운동 (헬스 클럽) - 20 분, 걷기(힘차게) - 6.5km/h - 30 분, 휴식 - 14 시간 45 분, 숙면 - 8 시간. 더보기
|
|