g_ortegam님의 저널, 2018년 08월 29일

G, it sounds as if those boys are helping you as much as you are helping them. My mom put drinking before me many times and then it was hurtful but I dealt with it. My meds take the edge off and I’m very thankful for them! They don’t fix anything but they help with the day to day anxiety and depression but not being overwhelmed, high stress etc. I’m a smoker and honestly getting away those few minutes help more than the meds. I’m not advocating smoking just explaining what works for me ;). I’ve found that the more I exercise the less I smoke. There’s a balance for me that when I get there I actually feel more alive! Too much or too little exercise doesn’t help my mood a lot. It has to be that satisfying level. In my experience, some people need a wake up call, most addicts in fact. Perhaps you caring for her boys will be that for your sister. Just please don’t give up on her but do take care of yourself! Find someone who can help you with the emotional burden and possibly care for the boys when you need a break. When you want a drink substitute that with a healthy activity until your subconscious starts on that activity anytime you have a craving. It worked well for my stepdad who was sober 24 years before he passed from cancer. I’ll pray for you and if you ever want to talk to someone who has been there feel free to message me! I’m good at ‘listening’ and offering the advice my counselor has given me :).  

Just read the part about your dad. I’m so sorry! We’ve had a few suicides as well. Not close relatives so it didn’t impact me as much as you’ve been impacted. That makes it all the harder plus worrying if she will go that road too. You can’t change her, you have a right to be disappointed and all you can do is be there for the day that she asks for your help in helping herself. Hugs hun  

You are amazing! Drown those negative voices with positivity! 

I’m so sorry you are going through all of that. You are so strong! Cutting off your “crutches” and focusing on getting healthy, while being there for your nephews makes you a super woman! As for your sister, I would bring it to her attention along with a few options to seeking help (like AA, or there are free counselors at the clinic/ churches and some free clinics have emergency services for detox and mental health) 

It is great that you are expressing gratitude one day at a time :) 

Thanks guys. I know I should focus as so many of us do on the positives. And that’s what we do right ? Plug along one day at a time. I just have to let you ladies and gents know how much I appreciate you and your posts. You’re right I’m not alone. There are so many of us going through our own struggles. And it’s how we respond and act when things get tough that truly define who we are. Love to you guys  

I could totally have written your post. We can only control ourselves. Hug. 

Hi g_ortegam, was touched by your post. I have family that sounds a lot like your sis and have tried and tried to help-like you said you've done. It took me a loooonngg long time to realize that they have to want to change-you can't want it for them. Sometimes you just have to step away and not walk with them thru their mess. Praying for them and placing them in God's Hands has been the best thing! And trusting God that He will care for them has been HUGE for me!!! Taking responsibility for your actions is good! Keep up the good work!!! GrammaGs 

Best u can do for ur sis is be a good example, she knows where u stand and what u believe....I was depressed and everybody knew it but me!!!